I have a few hours before Chemistry, and I figured that I should update in the limited time that I have before I go back into indentured servitude.

I'm kind of worn down by this week. It's been a very long one, and I am so tired that I could use some kind of vacation, something that I will not have for at least another three weeks. Not to mention, that there is one hell of a lot of things to do in the next three weeks, namely, two Civil War Papers, an Ancient Egypt paper, two physiology exams, two chemistry exams, an anthropology exam, a chemistry quiz, one ecology test, and other things I know I am not remembering.

Last night was not a very fun night for me, for a variety of reasons, none of which I care to really mention on here, because I never really know who in the world is reading this. I should have shut down the computer when I had the opportunity, however, I did not, and ended up staying up until midnight, only to wake up at 5 this morning.

Yesterday was a really long day, but somewhat productive. I edited my ancient egypt essay (which was pretty bad), however, I'm not certain how well he will receive the material and my analyses, et al. I also edited two of the essays for the LAS Scholarship, and today I'll be finishing up the Kane Scholarship. I wrote half the essay on contributing to the UCCS community, but I still have to write the other half on the significant event in my life. I am not sure which event to choose, because I think I chose transferring to UCCS as my significant event. I have not had many significant events this year that will change my entire life. Especially ones of a more personal nature. I have conquered no diseases, or overcome any kind of overwhelming odds. It has been a particularly bland year, to be frankly honest. I'm sure that I can come up with something. I might talk about my parents having Katie, and how I can be some kind of positive influence in her life or something jazzy like that.

Given words like "jazzy", you obviously can tell that I would love nothing more right now than to watch a whole bunch of those sappy 60's or 70's movies with Audrey Hepburn or Julie Andrews.

Well, I'm going to go do my running around on campus (picking up transcripts and the like), and then I'm going to edit everything again, and then get some reading done in Civil War and Ancient Egypt.

OMG. I am screwed.
I did finish a draft of my Ancient Egyptian history essay (due Thursday), and it basically sucks.
I finished a draft of one of four essays for scholarships (due Thursday) and it basically sucks.
I have three essays to write for Thursday, and a test for science olympiad to write for Thursday, and I have to edit my Egyptian essay.

I could cut down the scholarship essays to two, because one of them requires that you have financial need. I don't have financial need, according to FAFSA. Damn FAFSA.

My college costs of this summer are going to be around $2000. I'm probably going to make about $500 more at work this semester, and most of that will go to gas. Classes last all summer, so I'll have to squeeze in a job somehow.

I have like 2 and a half hours before I have to be at school, so I'm going to try to write an essay (on academic freedom) this morning before I leave, and then tonight, since I'm not going to my Civil War class, I can start on my fourth essay and then edit the other three. I also can work on writing some stuff for the heredity test for Science Olympiad, and finish my case study for physiology tomorrow.

Speaking of which, this weekend is going to kill me. I have to do Science Olympiad from like 7 to 5 in the afternoon, get my Chemistry results at some point during the day, and then at some point over the rest of the weekend, study for a Chemistry exam on Monday (where I WILL get a Periodic Table eye thing), a Physiology exam on Monday, my Civil War essay on Tuesday, and an ecology exam on Thursday. This next week is basically a week of hell.

I probably should not be updating, and instead should be writing an essay on academic freedom.

So most of this weekend is already gone, and I am plainly exhausted. Yesterday, I was pretty much going non-stop. I read all of my stuff for Egyptian History for this week, as well as finishing my Chemistry lab due on Friday. I read a chapter of ecology (blah, it was all "humanity is destroying its environment") and about 10 pages of US Civil War for next week.

I did, however, manage to begin my next cross stitching project (YAY), which is called "elegant geisha". I am going to go over to JoAnn's today after I finish my Egyptian History essay to look at more cross stitch things. I am probably going to do a cross stitch of this Gettysburg thing they had there last time because it looks cool, but super hard.

Today, I have two major things which I have to do: Write a first draft of my Ancient Egypt essay on Ptahhotep's Instructions. Right now, I'm going to organize my essay on some basic biographical information, the nature of Instructional Writing in the Old Kingdom and how it relates to Ptahhotep's work, and some of the implications that the work had. It's going to be a combination of an English and a History paper. I think the paper has to be between 6 and 7 pages or 5 and 7, somewhere in there. I would have liked to have started writing this last week, but with that nasty cell bio test, I frankly could not.

The second set of things to do is to write my scholarship essays. There are three for which I am applying, one worth $3000, one $1000, and one $2500.

I wish that I had more time to write essays and such as I would procrastinate.

I have not updated in a while, as I have been enormously busy.
My week this week has frankly been terrible. I have not gotten a lot of homework done since Monday, I think I pretty much wiped out on my Cell Bio exam, and I am pretty sure that I did averagely on my physics exam.

Fortunately, I was immensely productive last weekend, which means that this weekend, I have a little more room to breathe.

Next week looks something like this:
Monday: Physics Homework V
Tuesday: Write Civil War Essay, Cullen/Sizer 6-7
Wednesday: Physiology Exam on Monday, Chemistry Homework 6
Thursday: Ancient Egyptian HIstory Essay 1 DUE
Ecology Chapter 9, Egyptian history reading
Friday: Chapter 11 Physiology, Lab VI (Chem), Chemistry Exam Monday

This weekend, I forgot to mention, will pretty much be solely dedicated to doing homework, namely, my Egyptian History essay. That happens to be the number one priority for the rest of this week and early into next. The week after that is my second official week of hell, as I have a physiology exam on Monday, a Chemistry exam on Monday, a Civil War essay due on Tuesday, and an Ecology exam on Friday. The week after that I have two midterms (Anthropology and Chem lab), and then the week after THAT is my third official week of hell: Chemistry Quiz, Civil War Midterm, Egyptian History Essay II, Physics Exam II, Physiology Exam III.

By spring break, this is how much of each class should be done:
ANTH 104: 50%
BIOL 321: 59%
CHEM 332: 52.38%
CHEM 334: 52.57%
HIST 300: 50%
HIST 453: 50%
BIOL 370: 50%
PES 111: 50% (Get the theme?)
BIOL 302: 34.1%

I should note, in somewhat excited conditions, that the schedule for summer was posted today. I have two classes that I am definitely going to take, namely, Physics II for Calculus people, which I have to take, and History of the First World War, which is one of those Ooooooooh classes that you're happy to take along with your major. I would like to take Biochemistry I, however, they have not designated a time for that class yet.

I doubt that I will take the humanities class, because I really want to go see Celtic Woman, and I really don't want to have to start school up again the week right after I get done with this semester (not a good idea).

I'm leaning towards going a fourth year. I just don't know though. I guess I'll wait for fall schedule to come out, and then make a decision.

I have not updated for some time, however, I do have a few minutes before class to discuss the pointlessness of my life.
My homework progress has been somewhat limited this half of the week. I was incredibly productive on Monday and Tuesday, but since then, I have wavered, unfortunately.
This weekend I have no such luxury. With three exams next week, I need to prepare for physics and cellular biology exams.

There has been some good news, as the scantron on my ecology test was in error. Therefore, I not only achieved a 100% on my examination, I also destroyed any hope of a curve. Such progress is clearly adequate and up to my usual academic standards.

This week has been a depression from last in the academic field, as there have been so few points worthy of achievement compared to last week.

Today, my plans are somewhat narrow. Of course there is the usual regiment of scholastic work to be done, namely, my third Chemistry lab material (just a handout on Carbon-13 NMR), followed at some point by some sort of work. Unfortunately, I brought nothing with me that would be of sufficient utility of advancing my work for next week. Perhaps I could begin my research for my history essay due two weeks from yesterday.

I should be heading to class soon.

Stealing from Susie again

YOU:
1. a cuddler? No, I abhor physical contact of all kinds
2. a morning person? I'm kind of forced to be, given that most of my classes are in the morning, and that I sleep in the basement, and anyone else who is awake enjoys waking me up by walking in the kitchen above me.
3. Are you a perfectionist? Hell yes I am
4. awesome? No, I'm not
5. addicted to anything? Work
6. in your pajamas? No, I'm at school.
7. left handed? No

LAST:
1. friend you saw: Kristina, yesterday
2. phoned? I never use the phone.
3. sent email? My boss
4. message received over myspace? I don't have a myspace
5. instant messaged? Mary, although I don't really like IM

TODAY:
1. wore: cargo pants, brown shoes (both of which I have had since I was a sophomore in high school. My shoes have clay stains from my Manekins), black thermal shirt, and typical undergarments.
2. mood: Unproductive
3. today is: cold, snowy (not wet snow)
4. got any plans: I plan on finishing my Anthropology, physiology, and Civil War readings for next week. I may start looking for some sources on Ptahhotep.

FAVOURITE:
1. number: 39
2. colour: venetian red
3. season: Late Spring/Early Summer

Qs and As
q: What was the 1st thing you did this morning?
a: I awoke

q: Last thing you ate:
a: A bowl of cheerios with Silk

q: Do you have anything bothering you?
a: Physically, there are no ailments concerning me. Otherwise, I am still troubled by my excessive emotionality and my inability to commit to doing work.

q: What's the last movie you saw?
a: Notes on a Scandal

q: Where is the last place you went?
a: I am at the Library presently.

q: Do you wish upon stars?
a: I wish upon nothing.

q: Are you a friendly person?:
a: No. I am blunt, analytical, and frankly, arrogant

q: Where did you sleep last night?:
a: In my bed.

q: What color shirt are you wearing?:
a: Black

q: Do you have more guy or girl friends?
a: I have no male friends, so naturally, female.

q: When was the last time you really cried?
a: At least three or four years ago. I do have naturally occuring tears for purely moisturizing effects when I awake or if it is unusually dry, or if I am allergic to something.

q: What was your last thought before you went to sleep last night?
a: I typically avoid thought when I go to sleep.

q: What are you about to do?
a: Either my anthropology or physiolgoy reading for next week.

q: If you could drink anything right this second, what would it be?
a: Either Earl Grey tea or some super black coffee

q: What's your job position called?
a: Student and Spanish Tutor

q: What's your favourite month(s)?
a: I do not have a month which is my favorite

q: What was your elementary schools mascot?
a: I do not recall the mascot of my first elementary school, but the second was the Colts.

q: what's your favourite bottled water?
a: I do not purchase bottled water.

q: What will you be doing at 9pm tonight?
a: Either I will be working on something or going to sleep

q: Did you attend your high school prom?
a: No. Prom is irrelevant

q: Did you go to someone else's prom?
a: Refer to previous answer

q: Do you prefer coffee or tea?
a: Both are satisfactory

q: Something red within 5 feet?
a: Another individual's thermos

q: ever done the electric slide?
a: I am not familiar with that dance move

q: How much french do you know?
a: I do not know French

q: Ever crash a car, been in an accident?
a: Two accidents, neither of which was my fault

q: Do you look good in yellow?
a: No.

q: Do you sing?
a: Rarely

q: Ever sing in public?
a: I did sing kareoke once

q: Least favourite color?
a: olive green

q: Ever had dippin dots?
a: No

q: How many driving tickets have you had?
a: Zero

q: Do you own your own house?
a: No

q: At what age do you want to get married?
a: I have no intention of marrying

q: How many kids do you have/want?
a: I have already committed myself to avoid reproduction for the sake of preserving what little remains of human biological evolution

Apparently, my concerns about my first "Week of Hell" out of the five that I have this semester were somewhat overrated. These are the results of the "Week of Hell One":

Organic Chemistry Exam: 94% A
Cell Biology Quiz: 100% A
General Ecology Exam: 98% A
Human Physiology Exam: 98% A

So, obviously, no 94% curse exists.

I still, however, am very concerned regarding my Civil War presentation tonight. So far, I have gotten a feeling for each of my professors' grading techniques except for my two history professors. I anticipate a high level of difficulty in succeeding whenever I have no predisposition to a professor's grading techniques.

I decided that for my senior thesis in History, I would like to investigate the Spanish Civil War and the rise of Fascism there. For Philosophy, I would still like to pursue either an ethical system for astrobiological science or an examination into non-traditional health care ethical systems. I am considering undertaking the Biology thesis, so that I can graduate with honors in the department, however, I am not sure what to study or with whom I can communicate to begin inestigating a possible thesis topic.

I also decided that for my first ancient Egypt essay, I would like to investigate the life of one of the chief viziers, Ptahhotep, to Isesi I, as in our literature text, there is an extensive draft attributed to him. Perhaps there is some historical fruit in examining Ptahhotep's role and the possible reasons for his text, as well as some kind of analysis of that text.

That's my life right now, anyways.

I had to cut off my post last night. My sister came into the room, and I wanted to put up my post before she could read too much of it.

I am finding myself frustrated by the fact that I like SO many different academic fields. Pretty much the only things I would never do in college are art classes of any kind, business classes, engineering classes, and education classes. I could seriously see myself doing pretty much everything else. Well, there are a few things here and there about which I care nothing (like politics or anthropology), but I seriously could do all the sciences, languages, history, philosophy classes that I want, and more. I keep wanting to branch out and study more things, but I feel constricted by dollars.

I wonder if this is what the Renaissance age people felt as they went through life. Totally frustrated by the desire to know everything.

I really should be doing some homework for this week, but I cannot possibly motivate myself to do reading for things like Anthropology or even Civil War. Speaking of which, I have my presentation in that tomorrow, assuming that my 'partner' didn't forget again.

Things to which I am not looking forward: Physics and Anthropology. I think that the period between 3 PM and 7 PM on Mondays is literally the worst 4 hours of every week. I just don't get a lot out of physics, and I get absolutely nothing from Anthropology. I don't think that there's a class about which I have felt more apathy than anthropology. It's just insignificant. I mean, I know I felt some towards religious studies at Regis, but that PALES in comparison to Anthroplogy.

I've edited the list of classes I want/have to take in the next year. I am an idiot because now I want to add some Anglo-Saxon literature, some French, and some Spanish. Of course, I have no time for all of this.

I have better guaranteed grades (none are passing though...damn)
CHEM 332: 24.56% CHEM 334: 17.86%
BIOL 321: 20.45% BIOL 370: 22.25%
HIST 300: 0% PES 111: 6.45%
HIST 453: 12.00% BIOL 302: 3.1%
ANTH 104: 5%

I had better get back to doing something productive.

I probably should be in bed, resting for my long week to come, however, I feel pulled to write here.

I saw Notes on a Scandal today. ABSOLUTELY SCINTILLATING. I have not seen such a good movie in years. They were not kidding when they said that Judi Dench's character is the personification of evil. I should invest in reading the book. Anyone interested in the movie should probably see it, but there's a lot of the f word in it. No explicit sex scenes (as in naked sex, there's imitated sex with clothes on), no drugs, but some very excellent acting. If Judi Dench doesn't get an oscar for that, then I would be stunned. However, I have not seen Helen Mirren's role in The Queen (which I am considering doing this weekend), so I withhold total judgment.

There's something that was oddly appealing about her character in the movie. I can't quite put my finger on it, but there was something contagious about her absolute evilness.

Anyways. This weekend was not overwhlemingly productive, for which I will suffer this week. I aim not to have an overwhelming suffering though, as I will work to get ahead starting tomorrow, and maybe I can have some time this weekend to do what I want.

I was looking through some people's pictures on facebook, and it's stunning to me how much I've changed in such a short period of time. I've gone from being a somewhat social person to an almost total recluse. I never do any kind of social interaction unless it's with my family or people from school. Aside from Ceceand Kristina, the latter is no one. I avoid interaction at all costs. Perhaps I am not too far from being my own version of Miss Barbara.

I wish I could find the motivation to do work. Such motivation I am sorely missing. That is the advantage of no sociality. I would be so far ahead that the world would stand in awe if I had little to no distraction, however, that is not possible.

I can see myself when I am older, committing to nothing but work, taking about one day off a month. I would have no reason to care about anything else. And then?

DO YOU SNORE?:Not really
LOVER OR A FIGHTER?: I'm a passive aggressive person, aka, I don't really do either
WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR?: Working s hard to find out that I'm not worth shit
AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO BUILDER?: I was a psycho lego builder. I mean, I had little startships, townsthat would be destroyed by tornadoes, medieval kingdoms. I had a whole lego universe.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY TV"?: Sone shows are ok, lik Amazing Race, the rest I really don't care for
DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?: I pretty much never use straws
WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?:I was a freaking ugly baby. I still am freaking ugly.
HOW IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?: I would not have it any other way
WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?:Black.
DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?: When no one's at home, you should hear me. I make the glass reverberate in the house
HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?: No
ANY SECRET TALENTS?: I have no talents period
WHAT'S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?: I have not been on vacation for three and a half years.
HAVE YOU EATEN SUSHI?: Actually yes, I'm not a big fam of uncooked meat.
HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE "DONNIE DARKO"?: What?
DO YOU GIVE A DARN ABOUT THE OZONE?: It's hard to say. Ten years ago, the world was all goo goo over the ozone layer, and now that we're not using CFC's, the atmosphere should start repairing itself
HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE POP?: who freaking cares?
CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?: I'm lucky that I even know the alphabet
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE?: Twice, and I absolutely hate it
ARE SPEEDO'S HOT?: Should we recall that Ray abhors all exposure of human flesh?
WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?: I'm all for hunting stupid people, and people who butt into your business when they really need not to.
IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?: Oh hell no
DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?: no, I really hate my writing.
WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?: erthyromacin, amoxacillin, dimatapp, robutussin, coconut, and I cannot digest lactose for the life of me.
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, "I LOVE YOU": I pretty much never say it
IS TUPAC STILL ALIVE?: I know Tuvok, but no Tupac.
DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?:I have been to one wedding, when I was like 4
HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?: I'm not a big egg eater, unless it is egg-lemon soup
ARE BLONDES DUMB?: I doubt that there is a genetic propensity to stupidity based on hair color
WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?: I have never lost a sock.
WHAT TIME IS IT?: 11, and I have to wake up in like 6 hours to get ready for church (FUN TIMES, only not)
DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?: not really. People call me Ray or Raymond. I really could not care between the two.
IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING?: I refuse to eat anything from there
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR?: Today, coming home from lab
DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?:I don' like baths, you're just sitting there in your accumulating filth.
IS SANTA CLAUSE REAL?:Is this some kind of grammar thing of which I have never heard?
IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?: No

ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?:no
WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?: Porn, sex, drugs, and alcohol. Alcohols formed by the OH group by yeast in anaerobic environments. Ok, so obviously I'm addicted to work beyond anything else in the universe. Next would have to be anything with Judi Dench, Julie Andrews, or Audrey Hepburn. None of those first 4 things
HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?: no
HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY?: 2
IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?: I'm allergic to most legal drugs. Do you seriously think I would try an illegal one then?
ARE YOU WEARING SOCKS?: I would not be caught deadwithout socks
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: Three or four years ago
DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?: The judge is still out on that one. It's the only one I've got, so I may as well be happy with it.
WHOSE LIFE IS BETTER?: I just get the feeling that there's something out there I am missing
ARE YOU PSYCHIC?:no, just logical
HAVE YOU READ "CATCHER IN THE RYE"?:No,
DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?: no
CAN YOU SKATEBOARD?:I'm opposed to things that cause that much pain
DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?:I used to, but I don't know if I can, it seems so artificial
DO U SNORT WHEN U LAUGH?:Who is u?
DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?:I would have loved to live in a time and place that had magic
IS A DOG A MAN'S BEST FRIEND?:With man's resume, I doubt he really has any friends
YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?:I don't know that I believe in marriage
CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?:no
WHAT'S THE LAST THING YOU ATE? dinner
DO YOU WEAR NAILPOLISH?:I have a pair of testes. What do you think?
DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?:No,
WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?:Anything with southern accents, like that Mike Shaw dealership thing
DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?: no
FAVORITE BAND AT THE MOMENT?:CELTIC WOMAN.

I am undergoing a curse. The curse of the 94's. I got a 94% on my Chemistry test, a 94% on my case study, a 94% on my ecology test. I hate 94%. It's a terrible number. 100% is a much better number, one with which I can be somewhat happy.

Yesterday and today are kind of blah days. I seem to be having an alarming frequency of blah days. I just came to school yesterday for the test and then went home, deciding not to go to Cell Biology or Egyptian History. I did however, get slightly ahead in things of life, including finishing all Egyptian History reading, some Civil War reading, Ecology reading, studying for my physiology exam, and a few other things over the last 24 hours. Tonight, I intend on splurging, as I can finally go and see Notes on a Scandal.

Tomorrow, I have to come in and weigh my product and take the melting point, so that I can finish my Chem lab tomorrow. I also intend on reading the rest of my Civil War stuff, which is only like 30 pages, reading my Cell Biology and my Physiology stuff. That means that I essentially have NOTHING due next week left to do. That ultimately means that Sunday is a FREE day, to do whatever I feel like doing. YAYness.

Of course, I'll be spending Sunday desperately trying to get ahead. I'll probably end up doing my next pre-lab, get ahead Anthroplogy reading, etc.

This of course will do nothing for me, as I'll just end up falling behind in the future. I might start doing some research for my first Egyptian History essay, and that way I can start writing it next weekend.

I'm going to get some lunch now. Bye!

So I'm not depressed. I'm sick. Again. I have some kind of a cold thing, and it's irritating the hell out of me.

I hate being sick. Why do I keep getting sick?

I'm going to take a partial mental health day. I'm definitely not going to Cell Bio, and I may not go to Egyptian history. I definitely have to go to ecology, given that there is a nasty ass exam then.

Speaking of exams. I think I got like a 94 on my chemistry exam. Major bummer.
I think I blew the $... out of my cell bio quiz. Not a good blowing up either.

I am so tired and so exhausted. I still have to study for ecology, which is massively huge.

I can feel the energy just slipping away and the years fading off the end of my life. I'm down to like 62 now. At the rate I'm going, at the end of this semester, my life expectancy will be around 23.

If I was feeling well, I would not complain so much, but when you feel like shit, there's like no motivation in the universe to do anything well.

I am somewhat disappointed, for the first time since I've worked on Wednesdays, there are a lot of people in here. However, I have am additional hour and a half that I must be here, so people will be leaving soon. Most came in about an hour ago, so I doubt that they will stay much longer.

I really could use some caffeinated substances right about...oh, now.

I'm really erratic tonight. The levels of class significance keep fluctuating as things come and go. Homework priorities mess everything up. However, I am glad to say that I have managed to finish my physics homework, and my anthropology reading for this week. Unfortunately, that's about it. This weekend=shit:
CHEM 332: Homework IV
CHEM 334: Lab II (massively huge)
BIOL 321: Read Ch 8 (neurons)
BIOL 370: Read Ch 7 and Ch 1 of Pronghorn book (what?)
BIOL 302: Read DNA replication
HIST 300: Read Liechtheim 3-50, still behind on Grimal by 40 pages
HIST 453: Read Ayers Torget VI, Cullen IV-V

I am still insistent on going to see Notes on a Scandal, however. I must insert this into my Friday evening schedule.
Fortunately, I have no commitments this weekend, aside from school.

I'm kind of blah today. Frankly, I have been pretty down since like last Thursday or Friday. If I keep going like this for another two weeks, I'm going to have to go to a doctor, I imagine. Of course, we have military coverage, which does not include psychiatric evaluations.

I think that I'm just tired, and will feel better in a few weeks if I get some sleep. Which unfortuantely I cannot do.

Yesterday really was not mentioning too much. Today was a little upsetting. I had put all this work into studying for my cell bio quiz, which was only one question (which is more important to life, water or oxygen), and I frankly don't think that I did that well. I said that without water, nothing would really be dissolved, and that cellular respiration would not work very well. Water is an absolute necessity, oxygen is an absolute efficiency.

In civil war, I was supposed to do my presentation today, but he didn't get to it. The other person in my "group"--he said we could work on it individually--had nothing prepared, and I think he assumed that I did not either. At the end of class I asked him if he wanted my paper that went with it too, and he said that he thought we were doing it together, and that I should hold onto it for another week. So now, I can have panicked editing for another week.

This week just is not a happy week. Tomorrow, when I have homework time after physiology, I have to study for my Chemistry exam, and then I take my chem exam, and then I have physics (non fun) a few hours later followed by work, where I have to study for ecology. Then on Thursday I'll have to study for physiology. In all of this time, I don't have a lot of time to do my reading for next week or for this week, so I'm going to start falling behind soon.

I need a good night's sleep.

I also need to find a way to totally destroy these emotions. They're irritating me. Back to my Case Study for physiology. That and shooting myself.

I cannot force myself to do homework. I just can't. And I have some stuff that I REALLY need to do. I did manage to finish my case study for physiology yesterday, but I still need to go back in it and cite everything.

The big thing I need to do today is this Civil War Presentation. I'm conflicted between doing the bare minimum or doing some additional work. I made a map of significant battles West of the Mississippi River, and I'm going to put a little bit of detail about some of the more major battles, including the texts that the book discusses.

Then I still have to write the paper.

Frankly, I'm an idiot. Why I wanted to do this much work is bizzare to me. At least after this week, I'll have a good idea of the expectations in the future for the rest of this semester. These are the points that are going to come in, just this week:
Chemistry: 1 Test (100 points), 1 Homework (10), and probably 5 clickers (6 points) 116 points, or 15% of this semester's workload.
Chemistry Lab: 40 point lab, 8% of semester's workload.
Physics: 1 Homework 3%
Civil War: Presentation: 10% of grade
Ecology: 1 Test: 25% of grade
Physiology: 1 Test (100), 1 Case Study (50), 2 class sessions (4), 17% of semester workload
Cell Biology: Quiz: 3%
Anthropology, maybe will have a quiz. He seems like the type who loves to torture people.

I think I should mention that after today, there are less than 100 days left until the end of the semester. The unfortunate this is that unlike last semester, I cannot finish anything early, as every class I have includes a final exam.

And, in the last like 2 hours, I managed to finish my power point. Now to start on the paper....

So my update is going to be lame. However, as promised, I have guarantted grades:
CHEM 334: 10.5% HIST 453: 3% HIST 300: 0%
CHEM 332: 10.3% BIOL 302: 0%
PES 111: 3.45% BIOL 370: 0%
ANTH 104: 3.46% BIOL 321: 3.33%

Um, today was pretty uneventful. I went to Chemistry lab, which actually, for once in my life, worked. Damn exciting.
Chem class was really short, and if there were not those two clickers I would not have gone.

Physics was physics. I was there for like 20 minutes.
Work was work. Busy all the time, and the LPN's running the Nazi cart.

Such is life.

Procrastinating

1. The phone rings. Who do you want it to be? I want it to be for someone else, so I don't have to talk. I absolutely, without discrimination, hate telephones.

2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? People who leave carts in parking lots should be shot.

3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener? I like to mix it up, but when I talk, I mostly talk about other people.

4. Do you take compliments well? Almost never. I downplay everything. If someone says "wow, you have four majors" I say "it's not five" and if they say "wow, you're smart" I say "not like other people". I could always be better.

5. Do you play Sudoku? Occasionally

6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive? I doubt it, because I don't have the heart to kill something, and at some point I would jsut go insane.

7. Do you like nipple rings? Why would someone do that to their bodies?

8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid? Never.

9. What was your favorite game as a kid? Video game: Shining Force or Sonic, board game, I think it was Monopoly.

10. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was married what would you do? I despise the thought of any person pursuing me. I would dash their hopes immediately.

11. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you? I couldn't date anyone period.

12. Do you like to pursue or be pursued? I hate the thought of both

13. Use three words to describe yourself? Skeptical, Reserved, apathetic

14. Do any songs make you cry? Not really, I haven't cried in years. I've kind of eliminated the emotion.

15. Are you continuing your education? Yes. I am going to do graduate work, because a Bachelor's degree without anything else is a sign of substandard work ethics and self loathing.

16. Do you know how to shoot a gun? No, but I would like to own one.

17. If your house was on fire, what would be the first thing you grabbed? Firstly, that should say "grab" instead of "grabbed". The question splits the verb "would grab", and "would grabbed" does not exist. I would get a grammar book to beat the pants of whoever came up with that question. Colorado Springs is not well known for its fire safety recently.

18. How often do you read books?I read school books pretty much all the time (when I'm not procrastinating).

19. Do you think more about the past, present or future?Future. Past is irrelevant, and present is obviously kind of boring.

20. Favorite children's book? Anyone whose favorite book was not either Dr. Seuss or Goodnight Moon needs to be beaten.

21. What color are your eyes?Blue. Precisely, royal blue.

22. How tall are you? About six feet, two inches.

23. Do you have a crush on 'Dave the Goofy Professor' from GoofyAuctions.com?
I have never heard of this individual.

24. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? No

25. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden? Probably 5 years ago.

26. Where was the furthest place you traveled today? School

27. Do you like mustard? I absolutely love mustard. I eat it with any kind of potato product, fish, and chicken.

28. Do you prefer to sleep or eat? Eating, because that gives me more pleasure.

29. Do you look like your mom or dad? I look a heck of a lot like my great-grandfather, supposedly, so more of my looks come from my dad's side of the family. Understandable.

30. How long does it take you in the shower? Actually bathing, probably 5 minutes. Doing everything assoiciated with it, like shaving, etc. is probably 30 minutes.

31. Can you do the splits? No

32. What movie do you want to see right now? NOTES ON A SCANDAL.

33. What did you do for New Year's? Slept, and watched Boise State vs. Oklahoma.

34. Do you think The Grudge was scary? I have never seen that movie.

35. Do you own a camera phone?No.

36. Was your mom a cheerleader? No.

37. What's the last letter of your middle name? S.

38. How many hours of sleep do you get a night? Between 6 and 8

39. Do you like care bears? No.

40.What do you buy at the Movies? I normally don't go to see movies. Too expensive.

41. Do you know how to play poker? Yes.

42.Do you wear your seatbelt? Yes.

43. What do you wear to sleep? Pajama pants and whatever shirt I had on that day.

44. Anything big ever happen in your hometown? We won getting USAFA and the Olympic Training thing here. Volunteers from the area helped defeat Texans at Glorieta Pass.

45. Is your tongue pierced? No, and that's even more unhealthy than the nipple piercing thing, because it exposes all kinds of metals to your body and supposedly degrades your teeth.

46. Do you like Liver and Onions? I like my liver inside my body perfectly fine, and I like onions inside my body as well, because htey taste very nicely and I love how after I eat them, I smell like them. (I have no idea why)

47. Are you in love?Not even a little bit, and not ever.

48. Do you like funny or serious people better? Serious people, who have an appreciation for work. Funny people think that work is not as significant.

49. Ever been to L.A.? Only twice, and both times I hardly remember it.

50. Do you visit GoofyAuctions.com daily?No. Never even heard of it.

51. Do you steal or pay for your music downloads? Library?

52. Do you hate chocolate? Milk chocholate makes me sick, so I eat Dark Chocolate

53. What do you and your parents fight about the most? Probably money

54. Are you a gullible person?I trust no one.

55. Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy? I believe people would be happier if they did not have amorous relationships.

56. If you could have any job (assuming you have the skills) what would it be?Honestly? I would be a Renaissance man, an expert in everything.

57. Are you easy to get along with? No. I may be the most difficult person to get along with.

58. What is your favorite time of day?it depends on the day.

I continue to be confused about the human necessity for emotional-dating-sexual connections to other people. These situations create complexity, which is incompatible with a stable work ethic, and compromise an individual's ability to function in a normal society. Each day, I confirm myself as more and more of a permanent bachelor.

I wish I was in Carrickfergus....

Ok, so I'm obviously listening to Celtic Woman. Irish songs are so depressing, because in the end, everyone dies or goes off to war. I love it.

This morning's educational input has been immensely frustrating. Egyptian history continues to evolve into Christian history and theology. He gave us a bibliography on books we could use in our essays, and over 2/3 of them have nothing to do with ancient Egypt. I don't know why I signed up to take that class, frequently. Ecology was just incredibly frustrating to me, for some reason. It's as if everyhing the professor said excited my anger complex, and I wanted to just hurt everyone within arm's length of me.

I don't want to go to Cell Bio today, because I'm going to be equally frustrated by the stupid questions these four people keep asking. Talk about wanting to cause pain. I should ask the professor to issue gag orders on their stupid questions.

Tomorrow marks the end of the third week of classes, and there are 16 weeks in the semester, not including the spring break week, so this means that there's a ton of crap left to do. I'm working on this semester in two parts, obviously, and I'm going to take it one half at a time.

I am tired of snow. I've lived in Colorado for 11 years, and NEVER has there been this much cold and this much snow. Never. There has always been fluctuation between warm and cold, and it's never been this cold for so long, in my memory. Since December 1, it has been above 50 degrees only once, which is actually quite stunning. I remember a few years ago, it was like 70 degrees in the middle of January. Tomorrow, the high is going to be, oh, about 4.

I am so avoiding reading Egyptian history. I am just not in the mood to read, out of fear of seeing the word "Christianity".

I am considering doing foreign study for a semester in some European country. Perhaps over a summer.