I wanted to make a list of what I think are the 10 best songs of 2006, in no particular order:

Shakira: Hips Don't Lie
Gnarls Barkley: Crazy
The Fray: How to Save a Life
Pussycat Dolls: Buttons
Jennifer Hudson: I Am Telling You I Am Not Going
Nelly Furtado: Promiscuous
KT Tunstall: Black Horse and Cherry Tree
Madonna: Sorry
Will Smith: Switch (This might be an 05 song, but I like it)
Sadly, I must admit that Justin Timberlake's Sexyback is a good song, worthy of top 10 recognition.

Anyways. Moving aside from my lame list,
the last several days have been uneventful. I made some of my killer Greek food yesterday, and I spent the previous two days moving some of this 8 foot drift that the city of Colorado Springs put in front of our house, causing pain to my arms, back, and hands which now have blisters on them.

I only went to church once. So I used up some of my church bank. I should have gone Sunday morning instead of at night, because guess who I had???? My favorite person ever...only not. Again, this is why I no longer like the other half of Christmas, the whole sermon was about stuffing happiness down our throats. Guess what? If I am going to be happy, it is not going to be listening to Fr. Brad's incessant stories which have little point and his jokes which have no humor. Unfortunately, I'll be leaving at the same time he will be departing from St. Pat's.

I don't think I've been to a full Mass in weeks because I've had him for pretty much all of advent. Mass is not supposed to last 1 hour and 45 minutes. The man just does not shut up.

I pulled my Jewish line again the other day. Fun times, seriously. I went to King Soopers to purchase cooking supplies, and as I went in, these Boy Scouts we selling last minute trees, and one of them asked if I would like to buy one, and I said, "oh no thanks, I'm Jewish". That line is simple, no explanations, no anything. The guy just said "oh, I'm sorry" no like a sarcastic one, but an "I didn't know" one. No questions, no anything.

Seriously, these lines are for expediency. Now, if I have one of those crazy Evangelicals come up to me and talk about Jesus, I'll pretend to be deaf, and start waving my hands like sign language, or I'll speak in Spanish, or something to get away expediently. The Jewish line does not work because it encourages them to try to convert you. The lesson from all of this is not to bother me with your problems and don't try to sell anything to me because, frankly, I don't give a damn about your stuff. If I did, I would come to you first.

For about a year now, I've wanted to have an angry confrontation with some religious figure, any one of them, but now, I realize that such a confrontation is a bad thing. Anger, while motivational towards some kind of initial push which levies all kinds of attacks, is only really useful in fight or flight circumstances. Instead, an emotionless response is best. It does not have passionate beliefs, or anything like that to back it up, which can be dissected and broken down by a patient barrage, even if it is lies. It simply depends on reason and logic. My responses would be short, and the discussion would end quickly. There would be no sort of hope for retribution of a victory of words on any other side.

The reason I have wanted to do this is because there still exists the underlying assumption that I have any intention of being a priest whatsoever, when in fact, I would be terrible material for several reasons. 1) I don't want to. 2) I don't believe in the existence of an immortal soul. 3) I don't care about the nature of God, what It is or what It is composed of is insignificant to me. 4) I don't think God has much to do with human existence. 5) I don't believe in free will. the list goes on, but those are the main five. If they continue to press on, I still have several things which can help, i.e. I have actually violated criteria which eliminate a candidate. Namely, intentional self injury (I have not done it in more than 2 years, so don't think I have an issue with it), but I don't feel sorry for it at all. If that even fails, then I have the ultiamte statement that essentially, I'm not really all that Catholic.

Once such an impression is crushed, I will be left alone, and for the last year, that's all I have really wanted. I am somewhat comfortable allowing their presumptions to remain, because then I do not have the confrontation to deal with, but I assure you, it is coming. I cannot hide out for the next year and a half. I will have to tackle the situation eventually, but for now, I am content to bide my time, and wait for the dawning of the combat. I will not be the aggressor, but I will not be defeated. Once I succeed ,then there is no uncomfortable truce, but rather, the plain fact that I am uninterested and that I wish to be left alone.

Al Alba Vincero.